On days like this I would like to climb into a box and stay there.
I am exhausted.
I should not have to defend or feel bad for crying. I am not made of steel. I have a heart and occasionally it hurts. and when it does it should be allowed to grieve. perhaps what I cry about doesn't make sense to you. but it doesn't have to. you're not walking the road i'm walking, you're not feeling the things i'm feeling, you're not me.
I am tired.
of being the apparently horrid ungrateful child. you have expectations of me that i struggle to meet. i feel inadequate when i can't meet them. when i say i don't know and leave the decision to you, it's not code for anything else. I genuinely don't know. i should not then be at the receiving end of your wrath for not knowing. it's not being recalcitant. it's not because i'm being difficult. it's because i feel out of my depth and would like you help. i know however that I get frustrated and that it shows and for that i am so very truly sorry.
but i am worn out.
i am pooped.
i am beat.
bushed.
done in.
and i would like to climb into a box and stay there.
Image courtesy of Centre for International Education on Flickr.
I am exhausted.
I should not have to defend or feel bad for crying. I am not made of steel. I have a heart and occasionally it hurts. and when it does it should be allowed to grieve. perhaps what I cry about doesn't make sense to you. but it doesn't have to. you're not walking the road i'm walking, you're not feeling the things i'm feeling, you're not me.
I am tired.
of being the apparently horrid ungrateful child. you have expectations of me that i struggle to meet. i feel inadequate when i can't meet them. when i say i don't know and leave the decision to you, it's not code for anything else. I genuinely don't know. i should not then be at the receiving end of your wrath for not knowing. it's not being recalcitant. it's not because i'm being difficult. it's because i feel out of my depth and would like you help. i know however that I get frustrated and that it shows and for that i am so very truly sorry.
but i am worn out.
i am pooped.
i am beat.
bushed.
done in.
and i would like to climb into a box and stay there.
Image courtesy of Centre for International Education on Flickr.
3 comments:
Don't give up just yet. You have a good life. You have problems, fair enough, but you have a good life. Call me, we'll go out for coffee and talk. Just you and me.
If its any comfort, this is normal, only it happens to people in different degrees. Try see things from the other side. Remember, getting tired or worked up or upset or angry is only because you love this person so much. So don't give up, it's all for a good cause. Hugs
hugs. I think I know why
let me know when you're at my mum's so we can yak!
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