Just back from watching "Stomp the Yard" with Buddy, 3 of 3 and middle child. Movie was entertaining if you like dance. Having never seen a rugby team performing the Hakka I guess I never fully understood how dance can be aggressive and scary. Parts of this film gave me a bit of an insight into how that's possible. So very different from my own very "smiley; this is how a heart sings" type dancing.
Before the movie we met with Gaea for a coffee. That was, if I'm honest, a little disappointing. Gaea was on top form as she always is when she sees me, but Buddy I felt didn't really try. That bothered me and I have been wondering all night if I'm a cow for letting it bother me quite so much. On some level I knew it was just that though Buddy is lovely he is also a little socially awkward and it was just that he didn't know _how_ to try. Knowing that however doesn't make it better and it's not the first time either. It's almost as if as soon as he's faced with people he doesn't know, if interaction isn't immediately easy, he shuts down and stops trying. I don't know if I find this acceptable.
I was disappointed and a little embarrassed as I'd been talking him up and was let down quite spectacularly. He would try a little with inappropriate humour, then when it wasn't well received he kept turning to me saying he doesn't try a lot as it always leads to awkward silences. Which of course aggravated the awkward silence *doh!*
He clearly has large self- esteem issues and I wonder how much of a problem this will be. If only he would see the intelligent, sensitive man that I see...
I need to try however not be so judgmental and not blow it out of proportion. It was one bad and there will be a few, but that shouldn't be the basis to flee. I don't wanna be Ally McBeal with the salad dressing on her date's face really, or I _will_ be the crazy cat lady.
I'd much rather be the crazy parrot lady though I think.
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3 comments:
Why do you have to make such an effort to see beneath him? In the end, you'll end up using all your energy but with little rewards. Buddy should remain your buddy.
J
you think? You don't think perhaps I'm being too judgmental?
Absolutely not. If it affects you so much that he's not much of an extrovert, and you have to make so much effort to understand him, then perhaps your personalities don't click... But hey, is he hot?
;-)
J
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